I have come to remember how much I HATE dating. Not because of the fun activities and the rush of it all, but I forgot how annoying it is to have to get someone to like you. I forgot that it isn't easy. You have to be your best at all times, always look pretty, always be pleasant. It's quite tiring, I must say! Plus, any person who wants to date at all can't help but want to be the one that is "looked for." You want someone to like you. Preferably, of course, you hope that the person who likes you is the one that you like as well. But it isn't that easy. It only works out like that once...and then "it'll all be worth it." Ok, does anyone else cringe at that whenever someone says it to you? I mean, obviously it's true, and of course it will all be worth it eventually, but when you don't know how long it will be until it is all worth it, that phrase is really annoying.
At the same time, I do like the feeling of excitement when you get to that point where you *kinda* think that *maybe* the other person likes you back and everything is really awkward and funny and both people are flirting incessantly. That's fun...if it ends well. Unfortunately about 90% of my dating experiences in the past were not happy times. It seemed that I would always get the type of guy who would lead a girl on to believe he likes me just so he can completely ignore me one day or just obviously turn me down. I had always been baffled by the way I got treated. I didn't think I did anything wrong. I always reacted according to what they gave me; I just return whatever amount I can sense they are giving. I really am careful about it. Which is why I would constantly get hurt over and over again from these guys who were indecisive about their love life. I remember now how frustrated I would get.
I'm hoping that this time around it won't be like that. Maybe I'll get the type of guys that actually pay attention to their actions. That would be good. One thing I am grateful for the expeience with "Cannon" is that now I know that some guys can actually be aware of what they are doing and how they affect the girl. I really am hopeful for this dating period, but at the same time I am SO worried that it will be the same as before. Any thoughts?
1 comment:
Don't worry. Dating has completely destroyed me at times (like, practically suicidal for 4 months), but you get over everything...until you're all better. And then you find the man of your dreams and life is impossibly happy! You're beautiful and have so much to offer, which means the guy you end up with is going to be AWESOME.
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